Naked, But Not Ashamed

RT @Anabagail: K “@iDOVA: Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable.”

So I came across that tweet few days ago. I wanted to add “be very afraid” to it, but on the second thought, I decided to ignore it and scroll up to other tweets. But I kept remembering that particular tweet and I decided to have a chat with myself and ask around.

Vulnerability does not mean being weak
or submissive. To the contrary, it implies the courage to be yourself. It involves uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure.
Most of us shy away from being vulnerable, but the truth is that, it’s part of development and forms part of our social relationships. Opportunities for vulnerability present themselves to us every day, the question is whether we will take them. We fear Vulnerability because we are scared of what people will find out about us and they may reject us. In order to be vulnerable, you have to be okay with all of you. That’s the thing about vulnerability that no one tells you about. Nobody likes to be misunderstood or taken for granted so we hide the real us. While self-sufficiency and autonomy can help us weather the storms of life, it can also rob us of true intimacy.

God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.

– Reinhold Niebuhr

There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief… and of unspeakable love.” – Washington Irving

No one likes to feel like a fool and no one likes to be hurt. No one likes to be criticized or have their faults pointed out or used against them. With vulnerability, you experience true connection— true love for yourself—and you begin to attract people to you who are inspired by your openness. C.S Lewis wrote “ to love at all is to be vulnerable.” Let me rephrase that. To live at all is to be vulnerable. We must learn to trust ourselves. It takes courage.

I am Olawale
I am a Reader

Thank you Bode afeniforo for choosing the title.

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20 thoughts on “Naked, But Not Ashamed

  1. No be lie. It’s true we hate to be vulnerable and this is why we shy away from even love. But then, life is nothing without love, Love is nothing without trust and you can’t trust unless you allow yourself to be vulnerable. Thanks for this piece. May God help us

  2. Hmmmm! The show of nakedness requires lots of discipline. But, if we keep practicing and repeating it. One day we won’t have to pretend, lie or act-up.

    Thank you for this piece. It stirs thoughts in me.

  3. Very big life issue summarized in this I wonder why stuffs like this shouldnt spread like virus. Almost everybody needs it. Bros, this is concise and precise. I want to be like you o.

  4. The danger in vulnerability is in being vulnerable with the wrong people. Some comments can damage you and affect your self belief and confidence for decades. Sometimes we go out of our way to compensate for people’s impressions of our real selves when we expose ourselves to them. Their rejection could be difficult to overcome or live down. And most people are not sensitive to this. They come out to make snide comments and remarks and go on without realizing the damage they have done.

    I agree with the writer that the first thing is to accept yourself first. Then you’ll be better able to identify damaging lies and resist emotionally abusive people, protecting your core from external viruses. Hurt will come anyways from those you have to bring close to you. But vulnerability is the only way we can truly be alive in full.

  5. Wale, thank you for this. The problem is that vulnerability exposes you to people who may hurt you with/without knowing it. But then that in itself is not a good enough reason to bury the true essence of ourselves. well done partner.

  6. without letting ourselves be vulnerable we will never live fully.

    I like the quote on tears too. They are utterly powerful.

    As you said, loving and accepting yourself first is key. All else will follow. We are also to be careful to not be vulnerable to emotional predators.

    More grace to you.

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